How to Find an INTJ Man
Do you want to find an INTJ man? INTJs are intelligent and independent men who are known for their logical thinking and critical minds. They can be challenging to date, but they’re worth the effort! So if you’re looking for a long-term relationship with a man who is intelligent and ambitious, here’s how to find an INTJ man.
How rare is an INTJ male?
INTJ males are one of the rarest personality types, making up only 2% of the population. This means that they can be hard to find, but there are a few places you can look.

Where do INTJ Guys Hang Out?
One place to find them is online. INTJs are often drawn to online communities where they can share their ideas and meet like-minded people. Look for forums and websites that focus on topics that interest you.
INTJs are also often drawn to careers that allow them to use their minds, such as science, engineering, finance, computer and information technology, or architecture. So if you work in one of these fields, you might be able to meet an INTJ guy through work, although one thing to keep in mind is that INTJs are very career-driven. It’s likely they won’t be as eager as other personality types to form romantic connections in the workplace.
Another place to find INTJ males is through mutual friends. If you know someone who is friends with an INTJ, ask them to introduce you. This can be a great way to meet someone, as you already have a connection.
Why meeting INTJ guys can be difficult
The thing about INTJ guys is that they don’t participate in big social gatherings with people they don’t know very often. This can make meeting them challenging.
You’re more likely to spot them at a cultural event or lecture, but even then, how do you go about spotting them or striking up a conversation?
Let’s dive into that.
How do you spot an INTJ?
One way to spot an INTJ is by their body language. They tend to have a detached air about them and prefer not to make eye contact. They might also be standing off to the side, observing everything but not participating.
Another way to spot an INTJ is by their clothing. They tend to dress in a more utilitarian way, without a lot of fuss or frills.
And finally, INTJs are often very quiet. They might not say much in a group setting, but if you can get them talking about something they’re passionate about, they’ll be more than happy to share their thoughts.
How do I approach an INTJ guy?
One way to strike up a conversation with an INTJ is to find something you have in common. This could be a shared interest, hobby, or profession. If you can find something to bond over, it’ll be much easier to get the conversation started.
Another way to start a conversation with an INTJ is to ask them for their opinion on something. INTJs are often very opinionated, and they’ll be happy to share their thoughts on a topic. Just be prepared for a lively discussion!
Finally, don’t be afraid to be direct. If you want to talk to an INTJ, just approach them and start talking. They might not be the most outgoing people, but they’ll appreciate your directness.
Keep in mind that INTJs are often very private people, so don’t be offended if they don’t want to share too much about themselves. Just enjoy the conversation and get to know them a little better. With time and patience, you might just find the INTJ guy of your dreams!

How do INTJs act around a crush?
How an INTJ acts around a crush depends entirely on whether they think they have a chance. INTJs are very calculating, intellectual people. They’ll size up a potential partner and determine whether or not they think there’s a chance for a romantic relationship.
If they don’t think there’s a chance, they’ll likely just keep their distance and not do anything that might give you the wrong idea.
However, if they do think there’s a chance, they’ll be much more forward. They might try to spend more time with you or find ways to start conversations with you.
They might also start being more physical, such as touching your arm or shoulder when they talk to you.
INTJs are notoriously hard to read, so it can be difficult to tell whether or not they have a crush on you. But if you pay attention to their actions and not just their words, you’ll figure it out.
Related Post: How to Tell if an INTJ Misses You (And When They Don’t)
Will an INTJ make the first move?
It honestly depends on the INTJ. In many facets of life, INTJs appreciate directness. They don’t like games and wishy-washy sentiments. So if they’re interested in you and have had time to mull over the situation, it’s likely they’ll step up and make the first move.
But that assumes they are aware of what’s going on. INTJs are notoriously clueless when it comes to matters of the heart and aren’t always in tune with romantic signals. They’re also not as keen to find a romantic partner as other personality types, as they’re very career-minded and goal-driven.
So in those cases, they might not make the first move, but would certainly appreciate a love interest bold enough to say, “Hey! I’d like to get to know you.”
If you’re interested in who matches best with INTJs, check out our INTJ Love Interest Guide for more insight.
Are INTJs hard to date?
INTJs can be both easy and difficult to date, depending on what you’re looking for. INTJs are very independent people who value their alone time. So if you’re looking for someone who’s always down for a night out or loves to cuddle, an INTJ might not be the best match.
However, if you’re looking for someone who’s intelligent, thoughtful, and challenging, an INTJ can be an excellent partner. They’re always up for a good debate and love to talk about their interests. They’re also very loyal and supportive friends.
Just remember that INTJs are private people who need time to themselves. So don’t take it personally if they need to cancel plans or want to spend a night alone. It’s nothing against you, they just need some time to recharge.
In conclusion, INTJs can be great partners if you’re looking for someone intelligent and challenging. They might not be the most outgoing people, but they’ll appreciate your directness. Just remember to give them space when they need it and to be patient.
FAQs
Are INTJs friendly?
Most INTJs are not what you would call “friendly.” They’re often seen as aloof and uninterested in socializing. However, this is not always the case. Some INTJs actually enjoy socializing and can be quite charming when they want to be. It really depends on the individual INTJ.
Are INTJs jealous?
Not at all! INTJs are very secure in themselves and their abilities. They don’t feel the need to be jealous of others because they know they’re just as good, if not better. In fact, INTJs often find jealousy to be a waste of time and energy.
How do INTJs show they care?
INTJs often show they care by doing things for the people they love. They might not always say “I love you,” but they’ll definitely try to show it in their actions.
Another way they show they care is by expressing an interest in you, your work, or your passion projects. They love to connect on an intellectual level, so if an INTJ is making an effort to connect with you over something you love, that’s a sign they care.
Are INTJs loyal?
Absolutely! INTJs are some of the most loyal people you’ll ever meet. They’re incredibly devoted to their friends and family and will always be there for them, no matter what.
Are INTJs romantic?
Probably not in the way you mean it. INTJs are not known for grand, romantic gestures. It’s just not how they operate. They’re much too practical-minded. But that doesn’t mean they aren’t romantic in their own way.
It also depends on the person on the receiving end of the gesture. If showing up to an important lecture you’re giving, paying close attention throughout, and then giving you thoughtful feedback and praise afterward is a grand romantic gesture, then your INTJ beau will absolutely do that!
If your idea of romantic is standing outside of your house with four dozen roses, then no, they’re not going to do that.
How should you text an INTJ?
INTJs do not like small talk in any form – verbal or text. So when texting an INTJ, it’s important to stick to what’s important.
If you’re texting them to express interest and want to see if they’d like to hang out sometime, just say that!
Don’t try to tease it out with small talk, as an INTJ’s reply will probably read as curt, which can be interpreted as a lack of interest.
They’re more likely to engage in an intellectual back and forth with you but may see ‘text’ as an imperfect medium for that conversation.
Final Thoughts on Finding an INTJ Man
If you’re looking for an intellectual, serious, and loyal man – look no further than the INTJ. Although they are rare, they make excellent partners who will value your intelligence and independence. Are you currently dating an INTJ? We want to hear all about it! Share your story with us in the comments below.
